Monday, March 31, 2014

Humerus Я Us

Mirth Makes for Merry Medicine
By Rick Fromme
Laughing Star 2
Laughing Star 2 (Photo credit: cindy47452)

Many of us are familiar with the axiom, "Laughter Makes the Best Medicine," popularized by "Reader's Digest." Recently, the physiological and psychological affects/benefits of laughter and humor have been monitored and studied. In fact, there's even a scientific name for the discipline: Gelotology. (Not to be mistaken for the quivering, colorful and dubiously flavored substance frequently served in hospitals.)

Laughter "as medicine" per se was first brought to the modern public’s (and medical profession’s) collective awareness by author Norman Cousins in his memoir, "Anatomy of Illness." Suffering from ankylosing spondylitis, a painful spine condition, he described how watching comedies, such as old Marx Brothers' movies, helped him feel better and get some pain-free sleep. It’s not just psychological; researchers have subsequently discovered that laughter helps the pituitary gland release its own pain-suppressing opiates. Laughter has also been found to:
  • Lower blood pressure
  • Increase vascular blood flow and oxygenation of the blood
  • Stimulate the diaphragm and abdominal, respiratory, facial, leg, and back muscles
  • Reduce certain stress hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline
  • Increase the response of tumor- and disease-killing cells such as Gamma-interferon and T-cells
  • Defend against respiratory infections — even reducing the frequency of colds — by immunoglobulon in saliva
  • Increase memory and learning
  • Improve alertness, creativity, and memory
English: synapse.
Synapse. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
It seems Yo' Mama Nature pre-programmed us towards humor, as its positive effects stimulate
several different physiological processes nearly instantaneously — not just the humerus, or "funny bone." Less than a half-second after we're exposed to something funny, an electrical 
wave moves through our higher brain functions of the cerebral cortex. The left hemisphere analyzes the words and structures of the joke, the right hemisphere “gets” the joke, the visual sensory area of the occipital lobe creates images, the limbic (emotional) system makes us happier, and the motor sections make us smile or laugh.

So enough of my medical monologue. Laughter's legit. Let's have some fun! Below is a hodge-podge of jokes, puns, quotes, videos, limericks and other things that will make you go-go "Ha Ha!" in the night (and day time, too).
Medical Check Up 
Jocular Jokes

A patient was just waking up from anaesthesia after surgery, and his wife was sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and , looking at her he exclaimed, "You're beautiful!" then fell asleep again. His wife, not hearing that compliment from him that often, stayed by his side. Several minutes later, his eyes fluttered open and he said, "You're cute!" His wife was disappointed because instead of "beautiful," she was now just "cute." She asked, "What happened to 'beautiful'?" He replied, "The drugs are wearing off."

An old man went to the doctor complaining of a nagging pain in his right leg. “I am afraid it’s just old age,” explained the orthopaedic doc, “there’s nothing we can do about it.” “That can’t be,” fumed the old man, “you don’t know what you’re talking about.” “How can you possibly know I’m wrong?” countered the doctor.  Replied the old man, “My left leg is fine, and it’s exactly the same age!”

The patient, miserable with a sore throat, body aches and fever, asked her doctor, ''Flu?'' The doctor replied, ''No, I drove here in my car."

Two doctors opened an office in a small town. They put up a sign reading: "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones, Psychiatry and Proctology." The town council wasn’t too happy with the sign, so the doctors changed it to "Hysterias and Posteriors." This wasn’t acceptable either, so in an effort to satisfy the council, they changed the sign to "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids." But no go. Next, they tried "Catatonics and Colonics" Thumbs down again. Then came, "Manic-Depressives and Anal-Retentives.” But is still didn’t pass.   So they tried:
  • "Minds and Behinds"
  • "Analysis and Anal Cysts"
  • "Nuts and Butts"
  • "Freaks and Cheeks"
  • "Loons and Moons"
  • "Lost Souls and Arse Holes"
... Still to no avail. Nearly at their wits' end, the docs finally came up with a title they thought might be accepted by the council: "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones, Odds and Ends."

Ian spoke frantically into the phone, “Help! My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart."

"Is this her first child?'" the doctor queried.

"No, you idiot!" Ian shouted. "This is her husband."

 Chortling @ Chart Entries

Puns: Getting Your Words’ Worth

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

The careless pyromaniac made an ash of himself.

“I have a split personality,” said Tom being Frank.

When I first tried the new cough syrup, I really had no idea what to expectorate.

I once had insomnia so bad I was awake until it dawned on me.

An unusual medical book is one which has no appendix.
Break a bone today and you'll hurt to marrow.

Sometimes a pregnancy is so long it seems like a maternity.

Someone with contact lens problems eventually found a solution.

The survival rate after a fall into a deep hole is abysmal.

He was a Red Cross donor until he went out of circulation.

The Model of a Psychopharmacologist

Quotes to Quack a Quick Laugh

"I become faint and nauseous during even very minor medical procedures, such as making an appointment by phone."— Dave Barry

"I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso."
— Rita Rudner

 "I'm not feeling very well — I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course."
— Groucho Marx

 "I told my doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places."
— Henny Youngman

"First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me."
— Steve Martin

"I went to the doctor and he told me I had acute appendicitis, so I asked 'Compared to who?'"
— Jay London

"A psychiatrist asks a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing."
— Joey Adams

 According to hospital insurance codes, there are 9 different ways you can be injured by turtles.— Wall Street Journal

Animal Antics

A veterinarian was feeling ill and went to see her doctor. The doctor asked her all the usual questions, about symptoms, how long had they been occurring, etc., when she interrupted him. "Look, I'm a vet — I don't need to ask my patients these kind of questions. I can tell what's wrong with my patients just by looking." She smugly posited, "Why can't you?"

The doctor nodded, stood back, looked her up and down, quickly scribbled out a prescription, handed it to her and said,"Here you go.Take one of these by mouth every morning. Of course, if  that doesn't work, we'll have to have you put to sleep."

Funny Animal Compilation

Magically Delicious: The Lucky Charms o’ Limericks

"An old man from Denver named Lee,
Had a prostate as big as a tree;
Because of his plight,
His sphincter was tight,
And it took him two hours to pee."

"There once was a patient named Silya,
Who asked, 'Can insomnia kill ya'?'
'That depends,' said her doc,
As he glanced at his clock,
'On whether you pay when I bill ya'.'"
— By Howard J. Bennett, MD

"When giving your patients an assist,
Save your back. Avoid doing the twist;
Beg, plead or yelp,
But round up some help.
Keep your name off the casualty list."
— By Betty Ann Cassano, RN, BSN

And of course, I had to quip with my own quill:

"A brilliant new website called MedMasters
Gives health care workers what they're after;
From job boards to networks,
To Groups and more perks,
You can now find a job even faster."
— By Rick Fromme

Last but not least, one of my all-time favorites ...  Bill Cosby's brilliant sketch, "Dentists."

In this article I discussed the health benefits research has discovered about laughter, scientifically known as the study of gelotology. I also shared jokes, puns, quotes, limericks and videos oriented towards the medical profession at-large. If you found it useful or amusing, please click Like and Share. Also, please leave a comment (or even a joke or two) below. Spread the laughter: if you found it funny, please pass it along. After all, a little humor goes a long way.

Rick Fromme combines entrepreneurial enthusiasm with an insider's knowledge of the medical industry to co-found Both his drive and perspective helps provide health care professionals with a superior mechanism with which to communicate, network and market their strengths. Prior to founding, Rick operated a highly successful medical device distributorship. Other milestones in his 12-year career in the medical industry include a key position at a medical device start-up company that was later sold to the Ethicon Endo division of Johnson & Johnson. You may reach Rick by connecting with him on Facebook, Twitter, Google+, LinkedIn and YouTube.

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  1. I could tell you a funny story about a real-life experience I had with an elderly Chinese acupuncturist.

  2. If anyone could use a good laugh its those sitting in a doctor's or dentist's waiting room.

  3. Laughter if not the best medicine is certainly cost effective.